I don't know what it is about my birthday, but last year and this year have been horrible. Nothing happened bad. I have just been mopey and hormonal. Today I woke up to a trashed house. Too sick and tired (mostly tired and depressed) to clean. So we skirted around the filth. Svend's been on call all week and it's been crappy. Everyone else had the entire week off...but since he was oncall, he was at work every day from 7-5. awesome. sucky. Which made it worse, knowing HE WAS THE ONLY ONE working and I felt like TRASH! And, he leaves with Tally to go to a conference this weekend. He's not prepared and I don't know what to do to motivate him. He's supposed to be going to pass out his CV...but he hasn't even printed one yet.
Anyway. I tried to take a nap... Svend told him to...as he played video games in the middle of the mess. which he totally DESERVES because he works SOOOOO hard. The kids just kept coming to ME instead of him. I locked my door and ALL of them at different times were banging, clawing, and trying to rip the doorknob off. SERIOUSLY! I finally got up. stormed downstairs. began throwing things away. slamming dishes...I don't do well when I'm tired/depressed/house is nasty/kids are bugging me/pregnant/hubby playing video games (even if he deserves an hour of HIS time).
Svend came in and kicked me up to my room. I went and sat in Tally's room for about 30 min...trying to think. which frustrated me more. Bergen is failing at reading. Tally can't figure out "new" math and we just fight when I try to teach her and Bergen refuses to even TRY to read at home. The little girls climb all over me when I sit down with the older kids to "tutor" them...and now I have another baby coming. Into the tiny townhouse where we are in eachothers faces and clothes are literally everywhere we are buried. I just need to make it to March! my parents will be here. We can get this place cleaned out and moved around to prepare for the baby.
Which I saw today. So nice to see a little form and strong heart beat. 9 weeks. A week farther along than my due-date said but 2 weeks less than I was hoping! haha. Dr is GREAT. He's LDS and in our ward and it was NOT awkward because I never met him before. The office was nice and the staff was wonderful! My scale was horrible but the PA just said "it's just numbers on a scale" and "I thought you were in your 20's" and "I thought you weighed about 20lbs less" WAY better than a nurse saying "mmmmhmmm" when they read the scale! :)
Anyway, just the blues today. Don't know what it is. We are leaving to go out of town in a few hours. I have had no help packing... but I'm almost done. Just tired and nauseous I guess. and stressed... ready to lay around at the timeshare!
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